How do you deal with members/attendees/people that don't like you

Never Take Anything Personally

By Fitness Presenter Shannon Fable

In the fitness industry we put ourselves on stages, big and small, every day and say, "Judge me." Of course, that's not really what we want from each person we look in the face and smile broadly upon; we are truly there to deliver something we are passionate about, something we created, something we love … and all we want in return is for them to take it, love it and like us!

You count the hours you put into honing your craft, the money you've spent on the education, the music, and (of course) the outfit. Is it too much to ask for them to just say, 'thank you' or smile back? Many times, however, we get blank stares, no response or, worse yet, negative comment cards (I call these 'nasty grams'). All it takes is one of the above to turn your day to grey. And isn't it a shame? Don't you want to just take that member and shake them saying, "Do you know how much effort I put into this??" Of course, you can't and you won't, but you want to because it just hurts.

I believe that of all the lessons I've had to learn as I've traveled down the road of fitness instructor, personal trainer and educator, this is the hardest … NEVER TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY. Yes, harder than mastering tapless, 32-count step combinations that blend seamlessly together; yes, harder than cueing, smiling and moving all at the same time. And, it took a LONG time to find some key phrases and thoughts to get me over this fundamental issue many of us face.

Here's the deal … everyone lives in a unique reality. I've got my reality, you've got yours, and they've got theirs. No matter how many similarities we have, we all arrived where we are, being who we are in a very unique way that shapes the way we view the world and other people in it. I attempt to approach every situation with this nugget and, more importantly, the belief that I am always doing my best. I know I do my best, bring my best, teach my best. I know I approach every fitness interaction with the best of intentions.

And .. if that gift is not met with a smile, a thank you, or warmth … it's not their fault, and it's certainly not my fault; we just live in unique realities and they just aren't meshing. Many times it's about finding a good fit … what members do you click with, what time slot, what formats; thereby realizing you can't be all things to all people but you certainly can find where you fit and play up to those strengths. If you have the desire to teach or train -- if you have the passion to stand up in front of a group of people and jump around in spandex to make them happy -- you WILL find an audience. Don't let the naysayers get to you …we need MORE people like you, not less.

Final thought, remember this…

From The Four Agreements (by Miguel Ruiz)

Don't Take Anything Personally …

Love & Respect Yourself; You are never responsible for the actions of others, but you are responsible for YOU. If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. You may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal.

Find your audience and keep up the good work!

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